us, taken during those early days of getting to know each other ☁️ the exhaustion comes flooding back when I look at this photo, but so does the high of just meeting her; of settling into us as mother and daughter.

a gift from the second time around is an inherent sense of patience and self-forgiveness in everything.

the healing, the nursing, the evolution of my heart and body. none of it is less challenging than the time before, but it feels a lot less permanent. and that sense of ease in knowing our new normal will continue to ebb and flow is what keeps me grounded on my hard days.

i’ve spent the week trying to get my milk supply up — (hydrating with 3 liters of water daily, making lactation bars, pumping after I nurse, resting, and having heart to hearts with ella girl on how we can work as a team) — it’s working, and we’re back in a groove. but what i’ll also say is when I experienced this as a first-time mom, it caused enormous amounts of stress and anxiety, mostly rooted from fear and guilt. that same kind of anxiousness doesn’t feel as tangible this time around, and I feel peace around wherever a new day will take me, if even unexpected.

so I guess my point in all of this is that motherhood is a series of feelings; of our biggest fears, and our biggest successes. sometimes we’re terrified, and other times we’re unmistakably certain.

so let’s collectively be easier on our own hearts, and let go of whatever we created to be true and instead celebrate what actually is. we’re going to have a lot more tough days, but we’re going to have a lot more good ones, too.